Lucy Alison Youngblood.
My daughter. She turns 8 years old today.
Typing that makes my chest hurt...my heart is pounding, tears rush to my eyes...it's too much. This love I feel for my daughter. The responsibility I feel to raise her up right--teach her, hold her tight, but not too tight; let her go, but not too far; show her how to be strong but not to push people away; teach her to be compassionate without being too much of a people pleaser; praise her humor, but remind her that it's okay to be sad too.
Eight years old. It's going to get very real in a few years.
Lucy was almost born on Leap Day in 2004. I went into labor and thought no way am I going to have a Leap Year baby who will forever hear those dumb jokes. Hell no. I had no reason to fear however, labor took a loooooong time and I didn't have her until the next afternoon. So now she's stuck with the jokes/comments about how she was so stubborn and was on her own time.
People say we look alike, which worries me because I have been told I look like a few people that I wouldn't consider so beautiful. Like Julian Lennon, which I wrote about here. And many people have told me I look like Lilly Tomlin. "Oh is it because I'm funny?" I boldly asked someone recently. "No it's the eyes," they said. Yup, my droopy ass eyes make Lilly Tomlin and me twins. I don't want to pass that onto Lucy.
There is so much more that I don't want to pass onto her...like my paranoid, needy, dark and twisty stuff.
The thing is, Lucy is so much like me. She is sarcastic, always going for the laugh, not so crazy about math, creative with that head in the clouds kind of aura and more.
Even her emotional outbursts are oh so familiar. It's like having my own damn inner child running around my house.
But she is so much more than a mini me. She is braver than I ever was.
Spunkier and smarter too. And boy is she tough. Living with three brothers will do that I guess.
As my baby girl enters into her eighth year, I am overwhelmed with heart pounding, chest bursting love for her. I pray, hope, wish that I leave more to her than my droopy eyes and manic overprotection. Somehow, I'm pretty sure she will let me know.
Lucy is of course the little girl in the picture in my blog header. She's also the inspiration for the name of the blog, click here to read about it.
My daughter. She turns 8 years old today.
Typing that makes my chest hurt...my heart is pounding, tears rush to my eyes...it's too much. This love I feel for my daughter. The responsibility I feel to raise her up right--teach her, hold her tight, but not too tight; let her go, but not too far; show her how to be strong but not to push people away; teach her to be compassionate without being too much of a people pleaser; praise her humor, but remind her that it's okay to be sad too.
Eight years old. It's going to get very real in a few years.
Lucy was almost born on Leap Day in 2004. I went into labor and thought no way am I going to have a Leap Year baby who will forever hear those dumb jokes. Hell no. I had no reason to fear however, labor took a loooooong time and I didn't have her until the next afternoon. So now she's stuck with the jokes/comments about how she was so stubborn and was on her own time.
People say we look alike, which worries me because I have been told I look like a few people that I wouldn't consider so beautiful. Like Julian Lennon, which I wrote about here. And many people have told me I look like Lilly Tomlin. "Oh is it because I'm funny?" I boldly asked someone recently. "No it's the eyes," they said. Yup, my droopy ass eyes make Lilly Tomlin and me twins. I don't want to pass that onto Lucy.
There is so much more that I don't want to pass onto her...like my paranoid, needy, dark and twisty stuff.
The thing is, Lucy is so much like me. She is sarcastic, always going for the laugh, not so crazy about math, creative with that head in the clouds kind of aura and more.
Even her emotional outbursts are oh so familiar. It's like having my own damn inner child running around my house.
But she is so much more than a mini me. She is braver than I ever was.
Spunkier and smarter too. And boy is she tough. Living with three brothers will do that I guess.
As my baby girl enters into her eighth year, I am overwhelmed with heart pounding, chest bursting love for her. I pray, hope, wish that I leave more to her than my droopy eyes and manic overprotection. Somehow, I'm pretty sure she will let me know.
Happy Birthday Lucy! Angela, what a beautiful love note for your daughter.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I think she had a good birthday. She was in a great mood and I asked her why she was being so cooperative and she said "because I'm more mature now." Lol!
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