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| Consoling JT at a basketball game last weekend. He got so excited he went to guard someone and poked himself in the eye. |
Sometimes that's what being a parent is all about. It's not about always having the answers. It's not about always being able to fix problems. And I hate that.
When my kid is hurting, I want to do whatever I can to make it stop.
JT, my son with Celiac disease, has had stomach aches almost everyday for the past couple weeks. Or at least I think he has. I'm confused. Did he accidentally get a little gluten? Is it nerves about school? When my daughter was in second grade she told me math gave her a stomach ache, which I totally understood.
We've been called to come to the school and bring JT home several times recently. This week when I got the call, I wrestled with what to do. Actually, I had no idea what to do. What if I'm giving into innocent little kid power struggles and telling him it's okay to use his disease as a free pass to go home? Or oh my god, what if the poor kid is in major pain and I'm being heartless?
Of course I wanted to run to him, scoop him up in my arms and tell him he could come home. We could snuggle, watch movies and eat really good gluten-free candy. Then everything would be better, fixed for a minute.
When I got to the school I found JT chatting it up with his new best friend, a third grader he just met, in the front office. "Are you sure you can't finish the day?" I asked him.
"Yes?," he said/asked suddenly very quiet.
We walked slowly to the car. I felt like an FBI negotiator...not wanting to say too much, too soon, approaching with caution.
"Honey, does your stomach hurt or is something else bothering you?" I asked.
"Nope, my stomach was hurting, but it feels better now," he said.
After 20 minutes of negotiations, he decided to go back into school, so we walked back in and he skipped to class.
I have no idea what is going on. I have no idea if I am saying the right things.
But I do know that simply being there for him did make both of us feel better. And I'm talking really being there--eye contact, full attention, hugs, comfort, love. Sometimes it's not about answers or solutions, it's just about being there, that I know for sure (this week).
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| Me starting my day just being there with baby Wade. |
Here's what else I know for sure (this week):
- Believe it or not, I am evolving. Or at least my T-shirts are. Never heard of T-shirt evolution? Check it--I went from everything being "alright" to everything being "amazing." Yup.
- It's the little things in life that bring big smiles.
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| Coffee foam shapes always make me smile, no. matter. what. |
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| A million Matchbox cars= smiles. Clean up not so much, but whatever. |
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| A kid's smile, I mean come on, right? |
- My life has been changed by a toothbrush. I am not kidding. I just got a fancy new Phillips SoniCare and I cannot recommend it enough. This is not a sponsored post, I didn't get the toothbrush for free because I'm telling you about it. It's just an f-ing amazing toothbrush and I thought you should know. You're welcome.
- Ever wonder how I spend my Me Time? No? Well, check this out anyway. In case you missed the latest MomPulse video check it out here:
- I'm super excited about the Grammy's and will be Tweeting during the show. Come play with me @AngelaYBlood.
- This movie looks silly, but everytime I see the trailer I laugh. Mostly because the singing scene in car because it reminds me of my brother and me. We used to take road trips together and I could sing any song, any genre and it drove him completely nuts.
What do you know for sure (this week)? C'mon, we're friends, share what you know. Leave a comment here or on the Facebook page.
Come play with me on Instagram @jumpingwithmyfingerscrossed.
Oh yeah, and come follow me on Twitter @AngelaYBlood and subscribe to my MomPulse YouTube channel here.
That's a hard line to find but it sounds to me like you are doing an excellent job! Just keep listening to your heart ... and your kids! =)
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time with this, too. A couple of times this year, I got called to pick up my oldest from school, and by the time I got there, he was chatting up everyone in the office. And in August, my 3yo with celiac will be in preschool. It's so tough to know for sure, but I agree that really listening is the best way to figure it out.
ReplyDelete(I laugh my head off at that preview, too!)
It can be so hard to know what to do but I think you're right that sometimes the best thing is just being there. Also, love the new tshirt!
ReplyDeleteI hear you on this . So. Tough. I've been there as a mom too. I think you're doing an AMAZING job. I like that word, amazing. Like your t-shirt! Seriously, you're feeling with your gut. You're listening with your heart. And your questioning your decisions. That shows you care. That means everything :) So glad you linked with #ippp this week.
ReplyDelete