Six Months From Yesterday

Today I am sharing a cautionary tale.  A warning as we enter into the season of year-end reviews and moving on into the season of resolutions.  Today I would like to take a break from my constant Christmas blogging to talk about another very important holiday, my birthday.

No it's not the big day.  But six months from yesterday, it will be.

Six months from yesterday, I will be 40.
And that kind of freaks me out.  

Last June when I turned 39, I thought it would be fun to make a list of things I wanted to do in the last year of my third decade.  And all I have to say is....what the f*ck was I thinking? I must have had a lot of caffeine or had some kind of manic high the day I made the list.  I mean, because, well...just take a look:

In the past six months I haven't done any of these things.  I started number 34, but I only read about four chapters of the first Harry Potter book.  I'm almost completely on track to be an ultimate failure at my third decade bucket list.   To be fair, Loretta Lynn and Lenny Kravitz haven't had a concert anywhere near my city. 

Oh wait, I did accomplish something.  I totally did number 11.  I watched two seasons of Scandal.  Phew.  So sure, the show has made me lose faith in our government and really all human decency, but at least I accomplished something on my list.

That's the thing about bucket lists or resolutions right?  You have to be a little realistic or risk feeling like a total loser.  

Six months from yesterday, I will be 40.

And I'm kind of okay with that.

When I first re-looked at this list, my reaction was "you haven't done anything, you suck, go back to bed! Oh my god you can't even do that. waaaaa."  But who said I can't change my list to-39 Things To Do Before 50?  That's like so long from now, I will surely be a yoga practicing, French speaking, tatted up, viral video making chick by then.  I mean come on, for sure, right?

In all seriousness, isn't that the beauty of being 40?  Finally feeling like "wait a second, I'm a grown ass woman I can do what I want."  Forty to me is feeling like it might be a bit freeing, a little empowering.  And I am ready for a little freedom and empowerment.  Jesus, I might break out into a version of Sisters Are Doin It For Themselves any minute as I type this. 

Whether it's changing headers on my to-do/bucket lists or coming to terms with relationships that just can't be fixed or meaning it when I say I don't care that I can't afford Botox for my forehead lines or that when I get really tired I look like Gilbert Godfrey, I am feeling pretty good about 40.   

Not to go back to another 80s pop song reference, but you might say I have a new attitude like Patti LaBelle sang about a million years ago.  And yeah, I'm feeling good from my head to my shoes, know where I'm going and I know what to do, I've tidied up my point of view. Mmm-hmmm. 

On a sidenote, I used to have this record and I knew every single damn word of this song.  I would wear my mother's fuchsia heels and sing the hell out of it in my living room.

These songs are really dating me. But who cares, I'm owning it.  Six months from yesterday, I will be 40.  The moral of this story is: be kind to yourself, be realistic with your lists, be willing to change your attitude, and 40 isn't old.

Do you make bucket lists?  Are you loving 40? Do you love Patti LaBelle's song New Attitude as much as I still do?